One Card, One Question Practice

This weekend has been very emotionally difficult for me. I am having a really hard time dealing with issues at work, that I really have little control over. It has me tied up in knots emotionally and I am unsure how to get past my worries and the emotions they bring.

I pulled one card: “How can I feel better?” or “What do I need to know about the situation to feel better?” are the two questions I kept in my mind when I shuffled.

 

 

The card: The 7 of Swords. Swords – thoughts and challenges. Yep. But isn’t this the thief card? Maybe I feel like my job is taking away my power. I feel robbed and unequipped to do my job? But how can I read this card in a way that will answer my question? I recognize the thief. I see him for what and who he is. Yes, he has put me at a disadvantage but I still have tools left to use. I need to be all the thief is not: honest, above-board, hard-working and not give in to the easy way out (such as thievery). It will be difficult but my focus should be on what I can do (the two swords I have left), what I have at my disposal to move forward.

 

That’s the best I can come up with. Happy Sunday!

 

One Card Practice

It’s Saturday and I have been doing my tarot practice for a week! Yippie Skippie! The not so yippity skippity part of the day is that I have to go into work for half a day. Yucko! So I am a bit hurried this morning. For a more hurried day, I have found that a one card practice, is just the thing. It is a quick little practice perfect for a time crunched day.

As I shuffle my cards today, I thought to myself, “What card do I need to see today?” My shuffling routine is simple. I riffle shuffle and cut my deck three times. My hope is that my deck knows my habit so “it” can put just the right card in the right place. I have read that you need to shuffle until you “know” it is time to stop so that the “card/s” can get to the “right” place. Either I am not doing it correctly or I just am not in the know, but that technique just never worked for me. The times I tried it I just never felt anything… on top of which I kept wondering if I was doing it right, should I stop now… should I keep shuffling… At least for now, having a specific practice has been one less thing to worry about (if I am doing it right). I am hopeful that synchonicity will put the cards I need in the right place, whichever way I shuffle.

My card today: 5 of Swords.

Initial Impression: Hmmm. I have seen this card recently. It came up during my “Work Question” practice. It is a Sword. That means thoughts, concerns, and challenges. Swords are Minor Arcana so this card deals with daily issues.

5 of Swords: Interesting card, the portion dealing with people pictured is gray and in shadow and yet the background is bright yellow with a beautiful big orange sun sinking into the ocean horizon. Water in the background. The figures in the card do not look happy. The cloaked man in the foreground has three swords and has definitely over come the men retreating in the background.

My meaning: Defeat. Feeling beaten down. Why? This card brings up this week exactly. I had thought things were going well at work and suddenly it all went to crap. I felt like everything was going my way and the tide turned and I pulled under by an undertow. And it made me mad and bitter at the bearer of this news. It was so utterly discouraging.

 

It is now 5pm: This card certainly was an omen of what was in store for me at work today. By the time my meetings were over, I felt like one of the wee downtrodden figures in the background. If there was any rays of sunlight about the day, I couldn’t see them… all I saw was defeat and impending doom. I think this card was telling me what to expect but to focus on the light, positive things of the day. I just don’t know how to. It is a challenge I need to work on.  Maybe tonight will be better

 

The first practice dealing with a real life issue

Originally, I was going to do one of the games that is suggested in the book Intuitive Tarot: Read the Tarot Instantly by Kelly Wallace. You pick a news story that will probably resolve in the next few days and pull cards to get a beat on what is going on. Once the issue is really resolved, you can see how accurate your reading was. If I were to do this exercise, I would be hiding from the main issue in my life right now, something I do frequently but would really like to stop.

So, instead, I will be pulling three cards (because I want as more information than just one card can give) today to tell me what I need to know about my issues at work (if you care to read about them they are in the “history” below.

 

I pulled Strength, 9 of wands reversed (for reversed cards I turn them right side up and put them on my pink template so I can recognize the card was reversed but can still easily read it) and 6 of wands.

And I actually smile. Yes, these cards will definitely describe what is going on at work. Looking at these cards in the most general way, I see one Major Arcana and two cards dealing with Wands.

And the Major Arcana card is Strength, something I need to cultivate more of in my life. Yes, it has been a life theme for a while now. I am the people pleaser, and generally it hard for me to have the courage to stand up and cause any kind of problem, legitimate or not. I tend to take the burden on my shoulders, deal with it quietly, and stress myself out all to keep things at a quiet unassuming status quo. So, the Strength card is saying to me that I need to find my inner courage and put it to use.

The 9 of wands reversed. Wands are about doing. This reversed wand is saying either I have a particular challenge doing or I need to be really aware. But what doing is the card describing? Guarding? I should know from all my tarot reading what this card means in the most general way… but I don’t remember so I will have to rely on what its images are telling me. There are many wands behind this knight, I read that as lots and lots of work, lots of battles that he has seen and he has persevered. He is out in front of them. As a reversed card, I take this as my challenge. I need to find courage and get out in front of my problems.

6 of wands. The wreath and the knight on horseback symbolize to me: Victory. What an awesome card to get. Cultivating and using my inner strength and courage I can persevere through these trials. Wow!

It is absolutely amazing to me that on my second tarot practice, one that the topic had lots of meaning and emotion to me, that the cards could tell me something that addressed the situation so spot on. It seems utterly magical (as in the magic the world can bring with all its amazing coincidences, beauty, complexities…)

Good one. What do you see in these cards? I would love for you to comment about how you read these cards… intuitively or any other way. Have a great day!

 

 

History of the issue (you can skip this if you want, it is rather mundane, if you aren’t living it) At work, about a month or so ago, they changed my position. I work at a big doctors office with several offices and several doctors. It is my job to go over all the individual charges for the day before and make sure they have all been entered correctly so the claims aren’t rejected by the insurance companies which delays payment. It certainly wasn’t a sexy job and I always felt crunched for time because I had to get through the entire days claims, or else. A month ago they decided that instead of having the two people at each office that do check-out enter all the charges for the day, that they would just have a group of four people at one site do them all. This drastic change in job structure has come about because the Coding system for sending charges to insurance is going to completely change in October and if the claims aren’t correctly coded with the new systems, payment will be delayed. The hope is that these four people will learn the new coding system and go over each charge as they are putting it in to make sure it is correct before the charges are sent to insurance. Unfortunately, the steps included in charging out and checking the claims takes a lot more time than management has decided it should take. Management also determined that I should be able to handle all the charges of three offices. I officially started doing my new job on Thursday and Friday, last week. I started with two offices and on Friday was expected to easily handle three. Also, one of the other girls was sick and the only other person available ended up having to do two really big offices. By 11:00 am I knew I was severely in the weeds. I wasn’t able to keep up and didn’t feel comfortable asking for help because the one other person who was able to do the job had double the work already. I didn’t think I was that slow but obviously I am, I wasn’t done doing all the charging until 8:30 Friday night (having started at 8:30 am). Mind you, I didn’t take a lunch, or breaks, or even get up out of my chair (which is physically REALLY bad and hard on me). I knew I was under the gun and was trying my best to focus and get done. I even watched my colleague do her charging to see if maybe the way she does it is faster, because she didn’t seem to have any problems getting everything done for her two offices but I do it in a very similar way. The big boss, even stopped and asked how it was going to which I said I would have to get back to her on Monday after I finished the day. (I didn’t go into how far behind I was… she would have only given part of my work to the other girl – and she had enough already). As she was leaving my boss said, two people should easily be able to do 5 offices if they had to. Seriously?

The point is: I am too slow. Or maybe this position really isn’t for me. I don’t mind doing the work involved but obviously I don’t want to be a detriment to the other people I work with and I don’t want them having to take the bulk of my work to get it done. It is really hard to admit that I can’t do the work and successfully complete it and it has been tying me up in knots all weekend. I really don’t want to keep this job if I have to be given a lesser load to complete it. That seems really unfair to the other people in my team that are going to be doing it with me. My old position will be going away… so if this position doesn’t work… I am unsure if there will be any position available for me to go to.

I don’t really know how to address the situation on Monday. I have NEVER been good at confrontation and there is a lot riding on this one. As stressed out as this situation has mad me, I would love the just chuck the job entirely, but unfortunately my kitties, my husband and I like to eat and have a house to sleep in, so that probably isn’t the best option. 😦