This weekend I spent what little free-time I had looking for a Tarot book. I have plenty to use to look up meaning but I wanted more. I can’t say exactly what I was looking for… just a way to make my practice and study deeper. My intention of learning Tarot was not for the fortune-telling aspects of it. Maybe because I am 51, and so much has happened in my life already, I am not so interested in just finding out if this or that is going to happen. Or maybe it’s because I have learned sometimes it is better not to know. I have found that what I want is often times not the best option. Life has a way of playing out as it should, if I am only patient enough to let it unfold without mucking it up. And though I have been in this world 51 years I am still trying to learn that lesson: to have faith in life’s unfolding and its better not to force my own will on a situation because it often (most of the time) only makes things more difficult (and botched up).
Instead, I would like the Tarot, for me, to be a way to become more spiritual, to become a better person. Tarot has a way of showing you the world or a problem in an entirely different perspective (78 different perspective, not counting reversals). I have not been so successful dealing with some life issues that have been a part of my life for quite a long time. I have come to think my way of seeing… life, my struggles, my issues, my relationships… is a big part of the cause. Maybe seeing from a different perspective will help.
I spent quite a while searching on Amazon for a e-book that might fill my need. I found one: Tarot of the Spirit by Pamela Eakins. Her book had lots of very positive reviews and seemed to be just what I was looking for. As I poured through the book I really liked the idea of Tarot as a tool for enlightenment down your spiritual path. As I read more, I began to realize that this book had been part of a tarot set which included its own highly specialized tarot deck. It was disappointing to find out that my own tarot deck wouldn’t do and that to follow the “spiritual” path you had to use that particular deck and see the tarot cards in the particular way Ms. Eakins described them. I am not against Wands really being about Fire and every Wand card is a spiritual look at Fire. But it seemed like it only addressed one aspect of the card… an aspect that wasn’t apparent in my tarot deck. I actually went online and looked at the Tarot of the Spirit deck and it left me cold. I was disappointed, why couldn’t Tarot of the Spirit somehow integrate all tarot decks with the spiritual practice the book was outlining?
Again, I searched. I found Tarot for Life: Reading the Cards for Everyday Guidance and Growth by Paul Quinn. It seems like it has a lot of spirituality and a more general perspective on tarot. I have only just started it but so far I am really happy with it. There is a great deal of good information and interesting examples of how to look at tarot and its meanings.
Today’s card Draw is based on the first exercise in the book: Find your Inner Teacher. Using just the Major Arcana cards I will shuffle and draw one card. This card will represent the one aspect of myself that this book is inviting me to discover and develop. I will pull the card but have been asked not to look up its meaning, yet.
The Card: The Devil.
First Impressions: Just great! The creepiest card in the deck. The card I really, really don’t like. But it is the card of bondage… addictive behavior. My relationship with food has bordered on addiction. I eat to soothe. To soothe the depression that has been a big part of my life for many years now. I have not found a way out from under the depression and reliance on food to combat it. Maybe this will be my time. Very interesting that this is the one card that pops up… hmmmmm.
It will be interesting to see how this card plays out as I continue to read Tarot for Life…